I don't think too much about things that scare me ,worry me and trouble me..that's my way of avoiding trouble..so when the time came for me to leave my dear motherland I was not too worried or troubled...but a little anxious of whether NYPD will throw away my precious huge boxes of pickles and spices and packets of maggi .I had my last Masala Dosa served by the smartly dressed Kingfisher air hostess ,thus on a cold winter night I started my journey across the Oceans.A word of caution of those planning to fly international ..keep your clothes to bare minimum ..yeah bikini would be the right dress for ladies. Every step you take towards the flight you will be asked to strip in the name of security ,after a dozen or odd striping I was so tired I bought a bottle of water ,one sip and I was at the next strip joint and they confiscated by bottle of mineral water ,clever ones ..I was planning to blind the pilot by splashing water on his face and tickling him till he pukes and hijack the flight .
The journey itself was uneventful ..my neighbours Mrs and Mr Sardar never let out a single joke from their huge collection .I bet there was an expectant and ready to laugh look on my face every time I looked at them ,they started snoring as soon as they were seated ..which left me browsing through the movies and falling asleep,thank goodness for the excellent movie collection I got good sleep ,my nose waked me without fail at all meal breaks ,my first experience with different varieties of bread and soft drinks started there .I had no idea how many hours I had slept,time zones were switching quickly ,the light inside the airplane was always dim ,I had no sense of morning ,noon or night ,I couldn't figure out from food either ,I missed Indian food ,it would have been so easy to tell ,Dosa,idly ,sambar : morning .rice ,roti,dal : noon,followed by another meal of rice ,roti ,dal :night
Munching and sleeping I reached my destination.Waited for the luggage ,dragged,pushed and managed to put it onto the trolley and through the customs clearance ,there each of my bags of banana chips,chooda,shev,MTR puliogare mix ,packets of chilli powder,chicken Masala and rest of the food contents were carefully inspected and the verdict pronounced: Not guilty .
Thank you God for letting me and all my packets into this country.Immigration was easy ,I let the guy know that I was the one person who held the solutions for all their businesses.Once I was through all this ...I was let out into the land of Opportunities ...to be contd...
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Friday, July 18, 2008
A human induced natural calamity
Humans are the reason for most of the natural calamities.....I have heard this a lot.How the humans disrupt the natural harmony through destructive socialization etc etc and thereby induce and bestow upon them these natural calamities .I believed those ..in a can be possible sort of way ,but it was not until I was the victim of a natural calamity which was absolutely 100 % human induced that I became a firm believer of this theory .
It was an ordinary day ,time somewhere around 7 in the morning when the door bell rang.I ignored the first few rings (as usual) hoping that the milkman ,the maid,the grocery man would go away ,my roommate would open the door etc...The ringing continued , I listened hard ..not a sound from my roommate .So I decided unwillingly to surrender to the persistent ring , the minute my feet touched the floor I was wide awake, standing ankle deep in water .Flood ..I panicked...heart skipped a beat ..I am dying ..should I grab my new jeans ? I could see frantic cockroaches running for their dear life ,I woke up my roommate and ran out of my room ,almost slipping and falling ,the water level steadily increasing, I reached the front door and hauled it open in an attempt to flee...... neighbours were outside the apartment ..water was steadily flowing onto the street , O 'yeah onto the street from our apartment ...O my God , forgot to close the outlet of our water tank .
After effect :
Late for work
A lot of work to clean all up the mess(all our rooms + kitchen was completely flooded)
Fine of 600/- for wasting water
And a lot of speculation about who let the taps open ..which remains a mystery till to date
and to top it all ,we the people repeated the flood another 3 times ..making it nothing short of biannual flooding festival.
Now I see that you agree with me on the Human induced natural calamity thing ;)
It was an ordinary day ,time somewhere around 7 in the morning when the door bell rang.I ignored the first few rings (as usual) hoping that the milkman ,the maid,the grocery man would go away ,my roommate would open the door etc...The ringing continued , I listened hard ..not a sound from my roommate .So I decided unwillingly to surrender to the persistent ring , the minute my feet touched the floor I was wide awake, standing ankle deep in water .Flood ..I panicked...heart skipped a beat ..I am dying ..should I grab my new jeans ? I could see frantic cockroaches running for their dear life ,I woke up my roommate and ran out of my room ,almost slipping and falling ,the water level steadily increasing, I reached the front door and hauled it open in an attempt to flee...... neighbours were outside the apartment ..water was steadily flowing onto the street , O 'yeah onto the street from our apartment ...O my God , forgot to close the outlet of our water tank .
After effect :
Late for work
A lot of work to clean all up the mess(all our rooms + kitchen was completely flooded)
Fine of 600/- for wasting water
And a lot of speculation about who let the taps open ..which remains a mystery till to date
and to top it all ,we the people repeated the flood another 3 times ..making it nothing short of biannual flooding festival.
Now I see that you agree with me on the Human induced natural calamity thing ;)
My Experiments With Exercise
By the grace of God I have a low metabolic rate ...in layman's term I put on weight pretty fast..
Thus began my experiments with exercise..I always treaded the thin line between the lean and the fat lane..and there was also the relativity ,60 % percent people are fatter than you ,by theory of relativity you become thin (calculations happen in your subconscious mind )
So all was going well till I took a job and moved to a metro ,from then on the 'Relativity' was not on my side .Looking around I was convinced that it was time to cross the line and join hands with the thinnie minnie's (they seemed to have a lot more fun than the other side and so the decision ) so a plan was forming in my mind ..So I listed down my options
1) Go walking
2 ) Join Aerobics
3) Controlled Diet
Combining the 3options..I had my first plan ..Walk to the nearest gym (Option 1 ) aerobics for an hour (Option 2) walk back home (option 1 again ,good planning) and diet
Synopsis:
Plan rejected
Reason :way too ambitious..
so back to planning.. Start with Option 1 ,next step move on to Option 2 and next Option 3 .It seemed reasonable. Alarms set and kept at the farthest end of the room.
Morning ...my alarm caught a throat infection after screaming steadily for more than hour
Though an hour late as per my plan, I didnt give up, squeezed into my running shoes and set off..only to realise all other joggers were on their way back ,people on their way to office were giving me a weird look and the metro being a pretty hot one was not in favour of my walking at that hour..
Synopsis:
Plan rejected after unsucceful implementation
Reason :Not a morning person
Mitigation : Try the same plan in the evening
Risks: Getting out of office before sunsets might lead to joblesseness
But before I could formulate my next plan ,I had to visit my family back home .As soon as I reached home everyone unianimouslly declared I have lost weight .I was happy and surprised ,maybe days and months of planning had paid off , or was it the one day walk which did the trick ?
The Mind :O God is it the relativity again ??
Next I opted for the true test of weight loss ..tried on a dress I had to leave behind as it was getting increasingly difficult to squeeze inside . ..and there.. it just slided on smoothly and I still had some breathing space...my confidence increased
The Mind :maybe the fabric expanded due to global warming
I decided to put an end to the speculations and went for a quantitative measure, found my old weighing scale and jumped on it..and believe it or not I was 5kg lighter.
My joy knew no bounds ..
The Mind : What about a book on 'How to reduce weight by strategic planning'
My first attempt at exercising Successful !! I was atonised at the power of my mind ,as it was my planning which helped me get closer to my goals..but in a few months I came out of the delusion ,it happened when I moved on to another location and started feeling the affect of low metabolic activity on my favourite outfits .So I took sometime and found out the real reason
So any of you seriously thinking of losing weight find a job at a place that will statisfy the above 3 .
And as of me ,I cant go back to my old job for various other reasons so my next plan is
Thus began my experiments with exercise..I always treaded the thin line between the lean and the fat lane..and there was also the relativity ,60 % percent people are fatter than you ,by theory of relativity you become thin (calculations happen in your subconscious mind )
So all was going well till I took a job and moved to a metro ,from then on the 'Relativity' was not on my side .Looking around I was convinced that it was time to cross the line and join hands with the thinnie minnie's (they seemed to have a lot more fun than the other side and so the decision ) so a plan was forming in my mind ..So I listed down my options
1) Go walking
2 ) Join Aerobics
3) Controlled Diet
Combining the 3options..I had my first plan ..Walk to the nearest gym (Option 1 ) aerobics for an hour (Option 2) walk back home (option 1 again ,good planning) and diet
Synopsis:
Plan rejected
Reason :way too ambitious..
so back to planning.. Start with Option 1 ,next step move on to Option 2 and next Option 3 .It seemed reasonable. Alarms set and kept at the farthest end of the room.
Morning ...my alarm caught a throat infection after screaming steadily for more than hour
Though an hour late as per my plan, I didnt give up, squeezed into my running shoes and set off..only to realise all other joggers were on their way back ,people on their way to office were giving me a weird look and the metro being a pretty hot one was not in favour of my walking at that hour..
Synopsis:
Plan rejected after unsucceful implementation
Reason :Not a morning person
Mitigation : Try the same plan in the evening
Risks: Getting out of office before sunsets might lead to joblesseness
But before I could formulate my next plan ,I had to visit my family back home .As soon as I reached home everyone unianimouslly declared I have lost weight .I was happy and surprised ,maybe days and months of planning had paid off , or was it the one day walk which did the trick ?
The Mind :O God is it the relativity again ??
Next I opted for the true test of weight loss ..tried on a dress I had to leave behind as it was getting increasingly difficult to squeeze inside . ..and there.. it just slided on smoothly and I still had some breathing space...my confidence increased
The Mind :maybe the fabric expanded due to global warming
I decided to put an end to the speculations and went for a quantitative measure, found my old weighing scale and jumped on it..and believe it or not I was 5kg lighter.
My joy knew no bounds ..
The Mind : What about a book on 'How to reduce weight by strategic planning'
My first attempt at exercising Successful !! I was atonised at the power of my mind ,as it was my planning which helped me get closer to my goals..but in a few months I came out of the delusion ,it happened when I moved on to another location and started feeling the affect of low metabolic activity on my favourite outfits .So I took sometime and found out the real reason
- I had to cook my own food (Here is where I got the inspiration for my book :101 ways of making bread delicious )
- Office hours were from Noon to Midnight :making me get up so late that I could skip my breakfast
- Other meals from Office Cafteria
So any of you seriously thinking of losing weight find a job at a place that will statisfy the above 3 .
And as of me ,I cant go back to my old job for various other reasons so my next plan is
- Jogging
- Biking to office (bicycyle)
- Join Marathons
Thursday, July 17, 2008
me too ..
After all the blogg hopping ,commenting and criticising ..I think I am ready for my own blog !!
So here I go ..the first post of my brand new 'blog' .
My experience of creating this blog was not an encouraging one..
all went well till I reached the stage of naming my blog url. .I entered 'the' name and 'Checked Availability' oops not available .Thatz fine ...some nice soul grabbed the name ..scratched my head thought of another name and hit the button again ..negative..next try ...response negative..and next and next ..I am on the verge of losing patience ..despising all the people who have cheated me of my beautiful blog names...and steadily losing out ideas (read random phrases from movies and books ) for my would-be blog url's . I was almost convinced the celestial forces were trying to convey a message that today was not the right time ,right place for my first step into the blogging world .With all these thoughts engulfing me ,I ran my mix n match 'Namer' algorithm once again ..and tadaaa ..what you know.. .I have a blog
So my note to first time bloggers (if there is anyone left to start one ,the whole experience has taught me that there not many left in the world of non bloggers) blogging is not for the weak hearted !!
Have a nice day /nice night ..and hope I keep up my blogging spirit !!
So here I go ..the first post of my brand new 'blog' .
My experience of creating this blog was not an encouraging one..
all went well till I reached the stage of naming my blog url. .I entered 'the' name and 'Checked Availability' oops not available .Thatz fine ...some nice soul grabbed the name ..scratched my head thought of another name and hit the button again ..negative..next try ...response negative..and next and next ..I am on the verge of losing patience ..despising all the people who have cheated me of my beautiful blog names...and steadily losing out ideas (read random phrases from movies and books ) for my would-be blog url's . I was almost convinced the celestial forces were trying to convey a message that today was not the right time ,right place for my first step into the blogging world .With all these thoughts engulfing me ,I ran my mix n match 'Namer' algorithm once again ..and tadaaa ..what you know.. .I have a blog
So my note to first time bloggers (if there is anyone left to start one ,the whole experience has taught me that there not many left in the world of non bloggers) blogging is not for the weak hearted !!
Have a nice day /nice night ..and hope I keep up my blogging spirit !!
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