Surviving the motorised rickshaw

Long after you move out of a city ,there are certain things about the city which will never fade from your memories..the smell ,the food, the heat and the auto drivers are some things which still remains fresh in my mind from my days in chennai ..
Yes ,the auto drivers and the endless fights with them.
How do you pick a fight all the time ,you ask.
Let me tell you .
You are new to a city ,armed with sign language, trying to find your way to all those different places.
Enter the auto , you get in ,give him the address ,Auto starts .
You get down 10 minutes later ,driver pulls out a number from air and presents it as the fare.
And the fight starts.
After a few more similar incidents ,you realize that the Meter is just a decorative item like the First Aid Box ,And to never step into the auto without agreeing on the fare.
There are a few things one should know to survive the autos and to avoid bankruptcy
Lets say you are on the look out for an auto.
1.Don't ever go to parked auto ..specially if the driver is reading , sitting around blissfully listening to thundering music.Stay away from them
2.Wait for 'running' auto .Signal all possibly empty rushing auto
3.Practice your tamil ,until one of them stops.(If they get a whiff that you are not from chennai and you don't know Tamil,then you don't stand a chance)
4.When one of them stops over , ask 'Insert Your Destination' 'pokuma' ,don't show any signs of eagerness or hurry ..even if you are dying to jump in and start off to your destination
5.If the driver agrees ...pop Ur next question ..Evalavu?
(If you are at this step ,the driver knows that you are seasoned player)
6. Divide the fare qouted by the driver by 2 and tell him that is all that you are willing to pay.
7.Then the bargain starts...make a note .don't fall for arguments like route to your destination is 'one way' etc..
8.After 3 minutes of bargaining ,if things are not going your way .it is time to use your most important tactics.
9.Tell the driver he can go on and pretend to start looking out for other autos(This could be your winning move ,has success rate of 95% )
10.Driver continues to mumble for a few seconds, and then agrees to your quoted fare .
You jump into the auto and start off your journey.
Headphones might come handy to escape driver's mumbling
These are a few pointers ,but nothing can prepare you for the real thing .. so if you are heading to Chennai..don't forget my tips !!